Ammonite (2020)
I have heard many folks write off this movie because it, to some degree, feels like the jealous little sister of Portrait Of A Lady On Fire who heard how many compliments her older sis got for her prom dress, so she wore the exact same dress the following year expecting the exact same reception. I acknowledge that the dress is the same color, the same cut, and style- but at the end of the day, folks, did that first dress include Saoirse Ronan sitting on Kate Winslet’s face? I THINK THE FUCK NOT.
Ammonite centers the historical geologist, Mary Anning (Kate Winslet), who was the original Girl Boss in the field. She has been “credited with influencing Charles Darwin’s theory of evolution,” but, of course, never received the respect she deserved in the sausage party that was the geological scene of her day (Gutterman, 2020). In the exposition of the movie Kate Winslet, who is serving us a delicious Miss Trunchbull’s milder, younger sister look, is made to look after Charlotte Murchison (Saoirse Ronan), who is very much giving us the most depressing baby doll in the toy store, due to the fact that she suffers from melancholia (don’t we all, baybeee?) and her cumbucket of a husband, Roderick (ew), cannot deal with her. This story is based on two real life ladies and research has shown that the two women did know each other, but as for a lesbian romance “there is no evidence to support that this actually happened” (Gutterman, 2020).
Coincidentally the findings of a separate study just came across my desk and…let me see here…ah yes…there is no evidence that I give one singular fuck about whether or not these real women kissed- let me have my fantasy! When it comes to considering the sexuality of most historical figures, I operate from a position of queer until proven straight. I need evidence to support the supposition that these ladies’ exclusive turn ons were:
Polishing Jurassic junk on the shores of the most bummerific beach in England.
Riding the occasional 1840’s dick.
Until I see the proof of that I am going to assume that they were fantasizing about prehistoric pussies while they were rubbing their rocks.
The actual plot of this movie is as unimportant as every word uttered by bitch-ass Roderick Murchison. The true substance lies in Kate Winslet’s eyebrows…in her perfectly supple lips… I mean- in the performances. The most egregious Oscar snub of 2020 is that of Best Supporting Actress for this film. The award should have gone to… the female gaze.
As evidenced by the following:
The way Saoirse stroked the keys of the harpsichord, which gave this author fanny flutters.
The intensity with which Kate stared at Saoirse’s feet when she took off her socks at the beach.
That one time when Saoirse touched Kate on the shoulder and everyone in the audience instantly orgasmed.
The true star of the film, however, is the presence of water. The very first sound that we hear in the movie is that of dripping water and initially I thought it was to serve a similar purpose as that of travel lube in a sleepover backpack, but as the film continued the use of water grew evermore dynamic. Saoirse, at one point, is prescribed a dip in the ocean to heal her from her extremely reasonable despondency after losing a child. The waves, however, prove to be quite unforgiving and they fuck her right up. After this incident she becomes dangerously ill and requires around the clock nurturing by the heretofore bristley Kate Winslet. Enter extremely erotic Florence Nightingale Effect, stage left. The ensuing salve rubbing on Saoirse’s back and (more importantly) chest results in outrageous sexual tension, which eventually erupts into a tantalizing sex scene in which Kate drops to her knees to eat Miss Saoirse’s pussy right off the bone. Following that moment of shared pleasure, the two women take a playful dip into the ocean together. This moment serves to depict the freedom they have found in one another.
Queer characters sharing moments of intimacy in and around water is not uncommon, as Fernando G. Pagnoni Berns describes in detail- specifically about gay men in Brazilian cinema (Markoff, 2019). He explains that “water favours nakedness…relaxation, and playful attitudes. Queer desires can be tested outside the boundaries of the ‘dry’ socially regulated world without fear of reprisal” (Berns, 2017). Others have noted that “water allows movement, and a lack of constriction of desire” in queer stories (Markoff, 2019). It is this author’s opinion that the part played by water in the film was invaluable in not only heightening the tension between our lovers, but also expressing the immaculate satisfaction of its release.
As for the numbers of it all- this filmed garnered an extremely impressive score in yearning due to the restraint in the story telling and that one time when Saoirse muttered “we should share the bed”- famous last words of any hetero sleep over. It also received a perfect score for the sex scenes mostly for reasons that I have previously mentioned, but also the fact that the only music happening during the various sex scenes is that of the ravenous moans of our heroines. Representation comes in at a 1 because every single person in the film is white. Authenticity and craft both receive a 4 because despite the screams from the haters, I believe this story and I was deeply compelled by the manner in which it was told.
Sources:
Berns, F.G.P. (2017). Water and Queer Intimacy. In: da Silva, A., Cunha, M. (eds) Space and Subjectivity in Contemporary Brazilian Cinema. Screening Spaces. Palgrave Macmillan, Cham. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-319-48267-5_11
Gutterman, Annabel. “The True Story behind the Movie Ammonite.” Time, Time, 13 Nov. 2020, time.com/5911139/ammonite-movie-true-story/.
Markoff, Anita. “Expressions of Desire and Water in Lesbian Cinema.” Screen Queens, 4 Feb. 2021, https://screen-queens.com/2019/12/01/expressions-of-desire-and-water-in-lesbian-cinema/#:~:text=Water%20allows%20movement%2C%20and%20a,presence%20of%20water%20encourages%20nakedness.
